Hey 2020, don’t let the door hit you

2020 . . . it’s time we said goodbye.

With your pandemic, and your lock-downs, hurricanes, forest fires, and your political unrest and  economic instability, and your Russian bots and your disappearing mailboxes, a presidential election and now a Supreme Court fight . . . the door is right there. Behind you. I’ll open it for you.

Like an unwanted party guest, 2020 lingers on. Everyone else has gone home, the music has stopped, you’re turning out the lights . . . and 2020 refuses to take the hint.

Well, since we have 97 more days of 2020, let’s play a party game. A warped, 2020ized version of “Would you rather?”.

What would you do to hurry 2020 out the door? To wake up and have tomorrow be January 1, 2021, would you do any of the items on this list . . .

  • go without your favorite food for a year?
  • write your next 10 articles on a typewriter?
  • drink a cup of hot sauce?
  • dance in front of your co-workers at the next in-person company holiday party?
  • sit through an afternoon-long Zoom call on 401K investment options?
  • watch every episode of Baywatch?
  • teach spelling to first graders for a week?
  • teach algebra to ninth graders for a week?
  • go skydiving?
  • start a conversation about politics during your Thanksgiving meal?
  • give up a social media platform for a year?
  • ask the IT Department to increase the size of your email inbox?
  • explain Google Analytics data to your CEO?
  • have your favorite tattoo removed or get a tattoo (if you don’t already have one)?
  • learn to code (using a language other than HTML)?
  • use “Powerpoint” as a verb . . . for the rest of your life.
  • listen to only one song — that you don’t get to pick — for a month?
  • re-write your company’s in-house style guide?
  • find the person you had a secret crush on in high school and tell them how you once felt?
  • take an accounting class?
  • go without ordering anything from Amazon for six months?
  • read only works by your least favorite author for a year?
  • do something to radically change your appearance (shave your beard, dye your hair purple, pierce your nose, etc.)?

How about it readers? What would you do to hasten the end of 2020?

 

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