27 alternatives to “I hope this email finds you well”

It seems to be everyone’s default, reflexive email greeting . . . “Hi Ruldolph. I hope this email finds you well.”

“I hope this email finds you well” is one of those awkward, forced-interaction phrases that adds little value to the email exchange, but acts as a crutch in the uncomfortable transition between the opening (“Hi Rudolph”) and the reason you’re emailing (“I need you to lead the sleigh tonight”). Such unnecessary phrasing adds to the noise readers are trying to filter out.

We’re all writers here. Can we come up with a few alternatives to “I hope this email finds you well,”?  Here are a few to start with, though not all of these will apply in every context.

1. Let’s do this
2. It’s me again
3. Your hair looks nice
4. Here we go again
5. Thanks in advance for your time
6. A blatant request . . .
7. I’m reaching out about
8. I could use your advice
9. I wanted to get back to you about
10. I hope you find this helpful
11. I’m looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this
12. Just what you want . . . another email
13. Drop everything and read this email
14. I’ll keep this short
15. I hope you reply quickly
16. Listen up
17. Now, please read this carefully
18. I will say this only once
19. Before you read this, promise not to get angry
20. Before you read this, take a deep breath
21. I hope you’re sitting down
22. Don’t read this email
23. This may not make sense to you, but here goes . . .
24. I’m only going to use one exclamation point in this email
25. I hope you’ve had your coffee already.
26. I purposely waited until the end of the day to send this email
27. Most of the project is on track

 

Readers . . . do you have any others to share?

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